Thursday, December 11, 2008

Birthdays




Birthdays are fun - when you are young. Not so fun when you are older. I look back on the 'many' birthdays I have had. I can only remember having been given one birthday party. My friend Cindy planned it. It was a surprise party at a local pizza place where our families frequented. It was definitely a surprise. I will remember it always! It was my 40th birthday and the gifts and decorations all centered around hitting the big 4-0, Over-the-hill, black 'things'. It was a lot of fun and very funny. Thank you Cindy! Now, I need to tell you that I am big on birthdays. Life comes and goes too quickly and it is my belief that you need to celebrate all your milestones. There are far too few things in our lives to celebrate, so grab the ones you can and make the most of them. When my sweet Hubby turned 30 I gave him a three day surprise party - what a BLAST that was! It's funny because birthdays, as with all special days or holidays, mean very little if nothing to him. I am the opposite. I love to give birthday parties and have tried to make each birthday for our children a special day in some way.

My birthday, being very near and before Christmas, is generally given the back burner. If ... the big IF, I get a gift for my birthday, I quite frequently (nearly always) get no gift for Christmas. It is just the way it is, even with good intentions. There are always so many other people to spend money on. I seldom (almost never) actually receive a birthday gift. If I do, it is wrapped in Christmas wrapping. Over the years the gifts I have received most frequently have been from our children; a handmade colored picture or card, coupons with the promise of kisses and chores done, an item or trinket that they no longer want for themselves. I save them. I treasure them. Someday I will scan them into my computer and scrapbook them.

Gettin a year older, for me, is not the issue. I think, truly believe, you are as old as you feel. In my mind I feel about 45. It's a good number, a good age. It's maturity and intelligence, a feeling of being capable to handle all things that are thrown at you with integrity and confidence. You have survived all those terrible teen years, made it through those amazing and scary twenties, found your footing through the thirties, and come to terms with who you are after you hit 40. It was prior to perimenopause and a time when I still felt 'somewhat' sexy. I still wore my tall high heels and dressed with flair. I felt 'good' when I went somewhere. While every bit of that is gone now, I am 59 today, I still don't feel old, and that is something to celebrate.

My husband left for work this morning, like most mornings, and before he left he placed a birthday card on the counter for me to find when I got up to make coffee and begin my day. It's sentiment was short. He usually likes to find a card that says just what he wants to say, but in everyday life he never says. This card says: "A birthday promise... a lifetime of love for the love of my life." I think that is beautiful.